Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ Category

Hello, it is me again.

May 22, 2012

School is now done for the year. At this point, I am not sure when I will go back. I turned in my resignation yesterday. It has been a perfect storm of issues at school and health issues with my mother-in-law and I don’t have any more to give at the moment. Two weeks ago, I stepped out of a hall only to have a running student hit me and I ended up on the floor. I don’t think she did it intentionally but my head still ended up hitting the floor. I remember lying there and thinking there had to be something better for me somewhere…………….

 

 

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Happy 2012!

January 1, 2012

It has been a long time since I have posted. It has been a hard year with learning my new job, dealing with my mother-in-law’s health issues and all the overall craziness this year has brought. I talked about the fork in the road and wondering what my next step would be. I think, that my decision will be to leave this job at the end of the school year. I suppose I could end up changing my mind but I think this job has not felt like a good fit for me. I don’t like the feeling of quitting something but I also don’t like the continual feeling of trying to do the job well and feeling that there is no way to do it. So………..

My resolution for this year is to make a new path. It may involve working for someone but maybe not. When I have a chance to rest up, my creative ideas start to flow again. I imagine making a mold to cast glass ornaments. I imagine working on a children’s book. I have started a new rughooked wall hanging and several projects in mind for the year. I want time and a chance to explore these ideas. I hope I can figure out how this will work.

Another resolution will need to be stop clenching. I got two crowns just before Thanksgiving because I had cracked two teeth. Tonight my jaw aches and I am wondering if I will need more work on those teeth. 😦

Like everyone else, another resolution for this year is to be more organized. We ordered two bookshelves and a tv stand that should be here in 10 weeks. It was a once-in-a-lifetime buy but hopefully it will help us get thing in a place where we can find them 🙂

Happy New Year!

The fork in the road.

November 6, 2011

It has definitely been a while since I last wrote. I started a new job, gotten two temporary crowns and have spent time trying to help my mother-in-law who hasn’t been well since her move to Kansas.

The fork in the road for me is regarding work. I nearly quit one day because of a devastating event at work. While I won’t disclose what happened, it was painful and made me question whether I want to continue teaching at this school. I was hired to teach special education but have spent the hours teaching middle school science instead. There is still the expectation I do the special ed. part to. There are new government forms to learn, new programs I am to be learning and implementing and new students I am to figure out how to reach. Individually, these would be doable but together it is overwhelming.

I watched the Steve Job commencement speech that they played on his death and it reinforced to me that I am not on the path I wanted to be on. I know I chose to do this job as I desire to help others and because I wanted a sense of economic security. Somehow though it doesn’t feel like enough.

I got a good evaluation from my boss the other day. I wanted to just yell though that if I were doing what I knew something about they would see what a good job was.

Do I dare make the move and if I do, can I make it work? i work on my rug hooking most nights to try to relieve the stress of work. Some days I leave at 6:30 and get home around 5:45. Then it is usually a few more hours in to try to feel like I have my head above water for the next day. Needless to say, I feel exhasuted.

Maybe the break at Thanksgiving will help me get rested up and make my thinking clearer.

These are strange times

February 16, 2011

Egypt  has governmental uprising. The Middle East is in turmoil. They are protesting in Wisconsin over the governor’s actions. Every time my bosses come down, they tell me they may be getting rid of me. My son-in-law is still trying to find a job. It is a very stressful time for so many people. I feel like I could use an extended vacation. I would sit in my house working on my rugs, weaving, embroidery, etc. and would watch old movies. I suppose I would feel antsy after a few days. Still, it would be nice.

I got word yesterday I passed my Praxis test. It was a long, grueling test but with that out of the way, I can get that new license. It came on the same day as my work evaluation……….. Talk about highs and lows. This idea that people can judge your body of work by momentary snapshots of your day leaves a lot to be desired. It becomes one of those things that you can’t argue with as they have the power. It would be helpful though if they were more constructive. I guess that is my approach though. It still hurts today but I am resolving that I won’t let it effect the people I work with every day though.

I was talking to my mother about these times. It is so tempting not to listen to what is happening in the world. I told her though we can’t be like these people who are being so greedy in society.  I think we have to resolve to work on hunger projects. It is the light a candle instead of cursing the darkness idea. We should resolve to donate more food over Lent instead of giving up some inconsequential thing.

 

On an up note, this is the progress I made so far on my rug.

I finished my class

December 9, 2010

I hope. It was a huge project. I think I probably wrote about 220 pages and had to go through several evaluations. My advisor was so positive and helpful. I had another evaluation from someone else though that was short and curt. It was depressing after all that work. I always take that stuff personally. I need to figure out how to stop that. Now I just have to wait until grades come out. I hope I haven’t forgotten anything.

Big meetings coming up. I have two next week and have huge one the following Monday. I have some of the paper work done. Unfortunately that Monday starts finals. Hope that all works.

55 degrees tomorrow, maybe 23 on Sunday. It is always amazing how the temp. fluctuates. It is 48 degrees now at 6:11 p.m.

Now tree up yet though. I am trying to talk Heather into doing it. 🙂

Thanksgiving is this week

November 20, 2010

There is only two days of work for me this week. Unfortunately, the colds that the kids have repeatedly brought to school have finally caught up with me. I feel headachy and have a scratchy throat. I managed to jerk my back again last night so I spent the day in bed. It probably didn’t help but I thought it would help the most.

My ill student was only in two days this last week. He coughed so hard on Tuesday, it was scary. He is supposed to have back surgery this week so hopefully he can have that. I don’t even want to think about it. I pray for God’s presence with him.

I plan on trying to finish my paper for college this next week. When it is finished, I am going to spend my evenings doing fun things. It sure has been a long haul.

There was a meeting after work on Thursday and the director felt bad about it so he came back to talk more about it on Friday. Funding is going to drop a lot next year for schools so my job may be on the line. I am not sure what to think about it. I told him that if it is the case, to let me know asap so I quit spending money 🙂

I missed the woodcarver’s show today. Maybe I will feel like going to see it tomorrow.

On Monday, I went to be fitted for a CPAP machine. I don’t know what I think of it. The first two nights, I kept having ear pressure problems when I opened my mouth. I tightened it up so that is better but I don’t know as it has made me feel better. The sleep still is erratic. I still often wake up at 3.

Hopes for a relaxing weekend

October 22, 2010

Things have quieted somewhat so I am hoping for a few days of peace.  This weekend has no meeting and our time is basically our own.

I took two boys from my Independent Living class out to see what it was like to work for a trenching outfit. They seemed really fascinated by it. They kept wanting to watch and we got back to school with 5 minutes to spare. Bummer for me though. I parked the van and then managed to trip on uneven concrete. I managed to skin my knees and hands and bang my hip. The ground hasn’t gotten any softer over the years. I am glad I didn’t manage to break a hip or something…………..

Monday, I take these same two boys and another one down to the bank to learn about how that works and then to the store to work on how to budget for a week. We will see how much different things cost. Hopefully they will get something out of that.

Jody is interested in one of my looms. Now I have to figure how to get it up to Wisconsin. I don’t think she is in too much of a hurry though.

Here is hoping we all have a good weekend. 🙂

Thank goodness for Fridays

September 24, 2010

I came home with my brain on overload today. Nothing bad happened but I feel like the juggler trying to keep all the balls up in the air and all they want to do is drop. (While I write this, the baby cat is either trying to lick me or bite me. I don’t think he has decided which yet.) I finally had to come home and go to bed as it was just too much.

The weather has finally changed. Sunday the high is only supposed to be in the upper 60s! What a relief that will be. I am so tired of the 80s and 90s.

I have gobs of homework to do. I hope to get some of the boxes unloaded and the other bedroom put in some kind of order. Jim hopes to go to the flea market in Meridan. Hopefully a bit of each will get done.

Cleaning on a Saturday night

September 18, 2010

Our hardwood floors were finished Thursday. They look so beautiful. It is nerve-racking thinking we might scratch them up but it is like having a new car. You know that eventually there will be a scratch but you like to believe it won’t happen.

Jim took his mom home. I hate to have him gone but I know it is important. So, I am trying to sort some of the boxes we packed up and to find a place for things. It is hard to part with some things. I know that the craft supplies  will be used at some time (I hope) so I hate to get rid of them.

Tomorrow I should work on my notebooks for my practicum. I have it started but really am stumped how some of this should look.

The cats are fighting. Shasta is having trouble dealing with the new cat. I managed to get scratched in one of their little tussles. I hope they work this out soon.

 

Painting again.

September 5, 2010

I decided it would not be good to get paint on new hardwood floors so I am spending this weekend painting. I have paint on my feet, on my hands, and in my hair.The walls are not finished yet though. It would be nice if it wouldn’t always heat up on the days I decided to paint.

The workmen are coming Tuesday. We will see if everything is done before that.